So I told you we had our third child! YAY! I am totally head over heels in love with her, as is Mr. Wright.
She has elements of both her brother and sister but in many ways she is her own little person. Little being the optimum word. In fact, she was our smallest baby to date- (did I really just say that?) weighing in at 8.8 lbs when she was born. I didn’t want to rush to finding a nickname for this one, so I kind of just waited for it to manifest itself, and manifest it did, in the most unlikely of places.
As you know if you follow my blog, I am totally obsessed ( in a very healthy way of course!) with cloth diapering and all things fluff. While eagerly awaiting this bundle of joy, I decided that with this baby I would graduate to the BMW of diapers- the more expensive and more customized fitted diapers. And what better brand to use then the exclusive, gorgeous, and insanely addictive Twinkie Tush (check them out at Twinkietush.com) diapers. These diapers come in three amazing sizes, one size, little tush, and the ones we would start with…. teenies……
And thus, the 3rd baby- who was smaller than Tiny… was so aptly named.
It fit perfectly. So now here I am the mom of Teenie, Tiny, and Baby Giant. Quite a team! And with the arrival of Teenie I have learned that my children have three very different roles in my career as a mother:
The first is Tiny. The original. She was my “teeth cutting ” baby. She was the one who gave me my training as a mom. The one I was scared to death to drop, or pinch, the one who kept me awake countless nights making sure she was breathing. She was all my firsts- the first smile, the first crawl, the first walk- all of that lies squarely with her. She was the baby who made me a mom.
Then came Baby Giant- He was my “Been there done that” baby. In parenting circles you will often hear moms refer to being BTDT moms. That means this isn’t our first rodeo. We know what to expect for the most part- unless you don’t expect an 11.5 lb baby to come out of your body, and then crawl at 4 months. Cause- I didn’t. But with my little boy I wasn’t as scared, nursing was a breeze, and basically every major milestone he has had has been compared to his big sister. (Sorry bud.) In some ways, I knew how much easier later phases of his babyhood would be that you might even say that I wished for him to grow faster- to be older than he was. And deep down I knew he wasn’t my last- so I didn’t really savor things . Incidentally at almost 2, that little man is still my big ole baby. In fact, I may just change his name to “Giant Baby.”
Then came Teenie- and she is my “take it all in” baby. She may not be my last, but she might be. Every time I hold her, I breathe her in. I spend an extra minute or so looking deep into her eyes. I hold her longer, I live for the end of the night when I get to scoop her up and cuddle her all night long. I love to look at the little outfits I bought her (with Tiny most of her clothes came from the gigantic shower my family threw us!) and pour over her endless supply of gorgeous fluffy diapers. I don’t want her to grow up-ever. I want this one to be my little girl forever. I have no interest this time in her first smile, or her first laugh. I don’t want to fold up her newborn clothes and put them in a box- maybe forever. This one has to stay little, and safe, and all mine.
Yesterday as he changed Teenie, my husband said something quietly (not so quietly) to her about “don’t tell mommy.” I turned around and looked at the foot pushing out from the pajamas that would barely snap, and a little twinge went through me. Babies just don’t stay little do they? No matter how much you watch them as they sleep, no matter how much you hold them, no matter how much you wish they would… they just keep growing…
And before you know it, you are the mother of a toddler… and then a child… and then a teenag….
No. I am not going to go there.
I have three little babies. They will ALWAYS be my babies….